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Wait what?

March 4th, 2019 was going to be the day I'll never forget. I just got back from London with my husband on Saturday, March 2nd and I booked an appointment to see a gyno about my period. That appointment was scheduled for Monday and knowing my body, I knew that I wasn't pregnant because I had no symptoms (or so I thought). My body was just stressed out from my job and when my body is stressed, my period don't come. Like literally doesn't come until I'm relaxed.

So by Monday, I went in for a regular check up and they asked me a shitload of basic questions like how often do you drink (I drink when I want to ok but honestly not that often), do I smoke, exercise and such. They asked me if I was pregnant before and that question kind of smacked me in the face. I knew it was coming and I wished they didn't ask it but they needed to know for my file. I said yes and I miscarried at 7.5 weeks also. It felt SO weird saying that and it hurts a little because my nugget would've been at least 3 months old by now. The nurse also asked when was my last menstrual cycle and I said November 21 of last year and I also added that I tested myself with three pregnancy tests, they all turned out negative. I wasn't surprised that it turned out negative because of my job and my body being stressed out, I wouldn't be able to conceive. I was told to take a urine test (thank god because I REALLY had to pee) and did my duty and went back to the room and waited a bit.

About 10 minutes give or take, there was a knock on my door and two ladies came, one of them was a nurse practitioner and the other was an intern. The nurse asked me if it was ok for the intern to stay in the room and I said sure because how else is she going to learn? We started off by introducing to each other and the nurse went over my file quickly and she asked me if I knew the results from my urine. I quickly said it was negative I assume because no one came in to inform me. "It's positive, very very very faint positive. It can be either very early stages of your pregnancy or late." said the nurse. Blood rushed to my head and to my heart, "WHAT? Seriously? No way. Really??" I started getting sweaty hands and my body was heating up.

WTACTUALF. I AM PREGNANT?! WHAT. THE. FUCK. WHAT. WHAT JUST HAPPENED? BULLSHIT. I HAVE A BABY INSIDE ME?! HOW THE FUCK IS THAT POSSIBLE? I HAD NO SYMPTOMS.

I couldn't fucking believe it like holy shit. Then, it hit me all at once. First time I got pregnant back in April/May, coffee made me nauseous so I stopped drinking it. This time, I didn't even think about it because I thought I was getting sick from my job. WRONG. I stopped drinking coffee in the first week of December, I was constantly sick (head cold, chest cold and major exhaustion), I was so cranky and moody in the first two months, I was vomiting/gagging a lot more than usual which led to me losing a whopping 20 pounds in the first trimester.  I slept a lot more than usual, I stopped eating specific foods because it made me sick and I drank a lot more water to keep me hydrated. Oh and missed period obviously.

The intern went ahead to massage my ta-tas for lumps and whatnot while the nurse prepared for the vaginal exam. The nurse did the vaginal exam and took a pap smear because it's been awhile since I had one and I wanted one to be done so I know that I have a healthy vagina. Then she did the internal exam to see how far I am. You guys. I shit you not, while she was doing that, her eyes actually went wide and she said, "Oh wow you're further along than I thought!" Then she was done and she said that she wanted to do a quick ultrasound to see how far I am. It was quickly hitting me that this is really happening, I do have a baby inside of me and I didn't even know. How is it possible when I tested myself not once, not twice but THREE times and it came out negative. I quickly got dressed and I immediately texted my husband. He was mind blown and shocked, which I was too. Then I went to get an ultrasound and the nurse said I was about 14-15 weeks along. I already passed my first trimester and was into second. I heard the heart beat for the first time and that sound is something I'll never forget. It was my first time hearing a heart beating from a tiny human inside of me and I cherish that all the time. I asked for a picture to show it to my husband and I texted him that picture and he immediately went into a daddy mode. "Is it ok?" Of course it is, it's moving around and the heart rate was 146 which is really good. And I said to him, "I guess we're having a baby! Just don't tell any one as of right now."

We told our close family and friends within the next few weeks and publicly announced it in the end of March. Turns out, my two sister in laws are pregnant too!! I'm due in the end of August, one is due in September and one is due in late October. My mother in law is OVER THE MOON about having three grand kiddies coming within three months. My family is so excited about their first grand child too, we're all excited but holy shit I just hope that I can keep my tiny human alive 😂

























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